Tag Archives: animal communication

No Pain – Lots of Gain!

We hear a lot about fear-based horse training. We don’t hear much about how bodywork can raise a horse’s fear threshold if done without regard to his/her feelings.

It’s very common for horses to be afraid of bodywork, especially if they have received fear-based training or a number of unpleasant veterinary procedures. Of course, veterinary procedures and surgeries are often non-negotiable. When I have a procedure personally, I can only imagine what that feels like to the horse who doesn’t understand why it’s being done to him or her.

The number of horses who have huge built in resistance is astronomical, and also some of those horses have shut down emotionally to be able to tolerate what has been done to them. Just look at the overflowing horse shelters. A huge number of these horses have arrived at the shelter abused, malnourished and neglected. Many come in afraid of the farrier, the vet, being caught, needles, lifting their hooves, being ridden – the list is endless. They may be in a lot of pain as well. They have an elaborate network of resistances holding them together, yet they are fragile, reactive or shut down, stuck in their flight/fright/freeze mode. In order to receive basic veterinary and farrier care, some may need to be sedated.

The inquiry phase of bodywork.

If you come to one of those horses with intrusive bodywork techniques, and that horse isn’t happy to see you, don’t take it personally. I see many of these horses who are overly cautious about what I might do to them. How do I work with them, relax them? First of all, I work on being as unthreatening as I possibly can be. And I don’t mean acting like I’m unthreatening, I mean really being unthreatening. I check in with myself – where are my resistances? Where might a horse pick up something that makes them nervous? I make sure I’m centered, that I’m not distracted, that I am just being. I have had a lot of practice doing this, but I think it’s practice worth investing in. Just be, chat with the horse a little. Lay your hand in front of the withers and talk softly. You may need to touch sore spots just to get information, but that part can wait until the horse is more relaxed.

As horse people, we can make countless decisions for our horses. One decision we can make is to hire only people who will treat our horse kindly. Of course, we need to have vets doing things that are unpleasant, as those procedures are designed to save lives. Vets are fundamentally kind, in my opinion. They are not the subject of this article.

If your horse is continually miserable or reactive during a visit from any practitioner, it may be worthwhile to re-evaluate that professional relationship.

If it takes me half a session to get a horse relaxed enough to accept and absorb the work I’m doing, I want to look at the whole picture. Is the horse in a lot of pain? What is the horse’s trauma history? Who else works with this horse and how?

Some horses have received so much abuse that they need a lot of work emotionally and psychically. They may be in their forever home, but their trauma is very deep rooted and challenging to change. Hopefully, owners will invest in this rehabilitative process. Some horses may be enduring ongoing veterinary treatments that are stressing them out.

I worked consistently with a horse who would get better after the session but the next week, would be angry and upset again. I learned later that she was being abused by a trainer in the time in between. It is similar  to when a child is being continually abused in the home, and gets better with various programs offered at school. But the child can’t move forward in development and remains in a holding pattern because the parental abuse brings the child right back to the origin of the problem, reinforcing it as other positive influences are trying to heal it. This is the agony of all child protective services as well.

I cannot move forward with the healing work if the animal is going to go back into the abusive situation.

Sometimes I find that the owner isn’t aware of what other professionals are doing with their horses.

Finding the right professionals requires moving out of our comfort zone sometimes, where we are not expecting pain to be part of the healing process unless it is a veterinary procedure. Humans are accustomed to expecting pain – even exercise programs are designed around the “no pain – no gain” principle. When bodybuilders come for a human bodywork session, very often they want to push against me with brute force when I ask for an isometric exercise. I will then ask them to just “think it.” This can be a new concept to those who are accustomed to leaving the gym like limp noodles.

There is a time and place for everything. The work at the gym is exercise. I break it down this way – bodywork, stretching and then exercise. The bodywork should prepare or rehabilitate the body without expecting anything of it and allow it to self-correct. The stretching keeps muscles and fascia supple so the body doesn’t seize up when it gets to the exercise part. The exercise keeps the body moving, encourages circulation and therefore nourishes the blood supply and all the organs, soft tissue and structure. It’s best to have all three, but if the body is injured and can’t exercise, then the other two must be employed before we can expect more from the body. We must give the body the right information to set it on its path for healing.

If the bodywork is too vigorous and sets the individual back, then it will take days to recover from it. Many people don’t know if the bodywork their animal is receiving is doing any good, but they keep paying for it because others at the barn are using the same person. It’s a routine, sort of like getting the teeth floated, vaccinations or using the same trainer. In their minds, if they continue to do it, they are doing a good thing for their horse. Or there is peer pressure and they may be afraid to change. Important information about healthy options needs to be made available.

Bodywork that causes beings to go into recoil and not want to engage is not allowing the body to find its own self-corrective response. Why is this important? Because when we engage the self-corrective response, ask the body which way it likes to go, what’s its preference, it comes forward and there is life and change in its response. Otherwise, the body is not a participant. It’s plain and simple. The body is being “done to” rather than engaged with.

A lot of people think of bodywork as a “spa” treatment only, unaware of the vast therapeutic benefits of a good session. A session should encompass mental and spirit well-being as well as deep musculoskeletal, fascia and visceral. I say “spirit” well-being instead of spiritual because I don’t mean it to be a religious experience, I mean that we are working with the very unique, individual spirit of the animal, on a level it can absorb and embrace.

Fortunately, awareness of animals’ voices is increasing. There are fewer people thumping on horses without regard to how they are receiving therapeutic work and more people eager to take the time to really be with the horse for however short time they have to make a difference. Without burning bridges, it’s up to us to build a team of worthwhile professionals who reflect the goals we have for our equines.

What changes should you look for in your horse during or after a bodywork session?

Certified Equine Body Balance Practitioner Kelly Reed works intuitively and gently to achieve full relaxation and engagement.

• In most cases, the horse should have better flexibility after the session, the tissue moving under the skin fluidly, topline relaxed.
• The limbs and joints should move better, and in cases of lameness, the horse should stride better if not be free of signs of lameness. These are individual cases.
• The horse should have improved respiration.
• Any horse should have a softer or brighter look in his/her eye and be less worried, if he/she was a worried one before. The horse should be more engaged.
• A horse who is immobile due to stall rest or laminitis will have some tissue changes and perhaps improvement in small movement.
• Organic changes will also result in relaxation, dropping of tension, better overall movement; in some cases, better digestion, greater energy.

Emerge from the Winter Doldrums with Equines

Over the winter, I feel challenged to provide quality time with my horses. I want to make sure they don’t get bored and prone to injury. I also want to maintain my connection with them.

Recently the question arose about how to provide “behavioral enrichment” for a mare who was recovering from recent illness. The ideas presented here are good for that situation as well as for navigating the uncertainty of winter weather and footing. Horses don’t know how long we spend with them, they only remember the time spent and can think on it when we’re not there. If you notice, if you spend time with them for half an hour, the next day they are generally more interested in you and what you might have to offer.

What you can offer will depend on where you live, your energy levels and what you have to deal with weather-wise in your location.

The person who asked about behavioral enrichment realized she had to get very creative. Yes! Exactly right! There are liberty exercises that can be done in muddy footing, which she and her mare had remembered from classes they took with me.

In this case, I also suggest bodywork as maintenance recovering from any injury or illness.

At our place, we put down shavings to create a small space to do groundwork and ride, and have horses who are not so fresh after all the bad weather. The footing is good for walking and trotting a small circle, in-hand work, or lateral work along the fence on good days. If there is any pattern at all during winter, it is snow plus cold, then sun and mud then a couple of days of dry ground so you can work.

A gelding I worked with years ago was going through a patch of being unridden and the owner was wondering what to do with him because he had become dull and uninterested in activity. We worked with playing the drum which perked him up. He loved the deep sound of it. This of course, did not work all the time, as he wanted to know, what next? But it piqued his curiosity so that he could go on to other liberty activities and groundwork, connecting more fully with his owner.

On a deeper level, making a sensory connection with horses is something we can do while standing in mud up to our eyeballs. We can sit on a feed trough and consider the horse’s world – the sights, smells and sounds of the barn, the chatter of ravens, the feel and smell of the cold air that may prickle against our faces. Horses are sensory beings, so this type of connection is truly valued by them as they live with this world 24/7. It may contrast to our constant doing, but it puts us in alignment with horses. It brings us into ourselves and who we truly are.

I have always been a “lick and a promise” type groomer, but recently I have noticed how much my horses enjoy being groomed. And I enjoy talking to them while grooming, and seeing the mud come off, even for a short time!

This type of engagement carries over, increases our mutual enjoyment of one another, so that when we actual do “work” again, there is more curiosity, engagement, a feeling of anticipation of what is to come.

Words Make a Difference

When I lived in New York City in another lifetime, I always wondered what it would be like to be a cab driver and hear all these personal conversations.

I think of horses having to hear all our conversations. Many times I think humans don’t realize the importance of their words, their stories, the emotional impact behind what falls out of their mouths.

This has come back to me recently with my young mare, Red. I get the distinct feeling that she doesn’t want to be referred to as a “rescue,” so I will refer to her as my young, adopted mare whom I got from a loving sanctuary. She has had a hard life packed into a short period of time and no one needs to hear that story over and over again.

Imagine if I was introducing you, my friend or colleague, and I said, “This is my friend Lucy. She was in a foster home; her father beat her and she nearly drowned when she was two years old.” Rather than, “I’d like you to meet Lucy, she’s a gifted painter and beautiful rider.”

We would like to be introduced in the best light possible. I say things that are true about Red and any horse that I know, if I know enough about them to comment. I say, she is the bravest, most courageous mare I have ever known, beautifully willing and enthusiastic. (If anyone will give me that much airtime!) And it is all true.

Recently, the true characters of some people have come forward for me with regard to her, and while some of these – even professionals – have been around for some time and well regarded, I have felt disappointed by their response and lack of respect for my horse and for others. They may not talk disrespectfully about all horses but if they do that about just one, it’s in their hearts.

A lot of this arises out of fear, as horses who have been mistreated in the past may respond in a flight/fright mode. Some horses really aren’t safe to be around. We don’t know what they might do. I understand that, and it may mean not working with that animal or minimizing contact. In all these situations, it’s important to recognize our fear of the horse who doesn’t do exactly what we want or might exhibit some unwanted behavior. Recognize what the animal is able to offer and start from there. The horse may behave very well with its owner but have trouble with strangers, and it takes awhile to overcome what abuse may have taken place at the hands of strangers.

Also, people who call horses unflattering names are not doing horses any favors. It’s fine to call them little gentle pet names like goofballs, which I’m fond of calling my geldings, but not mean names. The horse takes it all in. My sense is that they have heard the bad name before in a much less pleasant setting and it brings back memories. I’ve noticed my mare Red has a sensitivity to certain names and I expect that she’s heard those mean names before.

Even a story of another horse’s trouble can upset a horse. And I know this sounds crazy to some, but the horse feels it and the horse can see it in pictures. The horse may convey those pictures to me. My horses do that, and some client horses do too.

I used to go into this whole thing about relaying stories about how someone mistreated a horse and how awful that was, but the horse doesn’t want to attach itself to that story anymore. It wants the new beginning it’s been offered, the new richness of love and respect. If I need to discuss background with an owner, I will try to minimize the story, have them fill out a form beforehand, or talk about it away from the horse. Ultimately, the horse’s demeanor and body will tell the most important parts of the story.

We have more rescues and horses who may have come on hard times after being worked really hard, won their owners money or other kudos, than ever before. Horse shelters and kill pens are overflowing. And so many horses have lives the equivalent of going from one home to another, as in a foster care situation, or worse, knowing they are one step away from slaughter. This is hardly good for their self-esteem.

With that said, there are some horses who want to be the subject of the story, and enjoy hearing how they were rescued or how they got well after being ill for a long time. Usually it’s an older horse that feels proud of what he or she has accomplished. I have one like that – I can talk about his story and he is very pleased to have people know about him. But I talk about it in a way that shows how proud I am of his accomplishments and that helps people know him better and admire him.

For the hour or hours that I’m entrusted with a horse’s care,  I bring my best to them, and I want to acknowledge their gifts, their personality, who they really are. That’s the beginning of any session we share. I can’t bring them all home with me, but that time we share is a healing time just for them and their owners. I want it to integrate into their daily lives as a positive change.

Bottom line: horses are in our care, and if we bring them our joy at seeing them, remarking on something really cool or positive about them each day, their nervous systems will surely relax and seek to connect.

Onto the Mesa

As my horse and I travel up the rise of the one track trail onto the mesa it feels and looks different somehow. Not just the weather has kept me away for a few months. Injuries, new horse training. All that went before falls away as we get to experience the lightness of steps and rhythm of the shift in terrain.

At last, we have some beautiful weather. The breeze carries scents of new growth, perhaps some old loamy plant material enriching the earth. We hear and feel the slight tremble of small animals emerging from the land, ready to run in the sun, aware of us as we have been gone for many months.

In our part of the world, we have had a difficult winter. Footing has been terrible for long stretches and the cold reached into the bones and leached every desire to even buckle the girth. There were fewer days to ride or do any groundwork with horses.

The horses and I became restless. My horse had an injury, a pull to the hamstrings from whacking the points of his hips while charging through a half open gate.

There was a vet visit and a lot of bodywork in the beginning, then less as time went on. My vet told me that most horses would recover from that injury in six to nine months, but mine would probably recover in two-three months. It took a little more than one month.

What did I do? We took walks and did bodywork.

I had surgery last year, and certainly the surgery went well, and everything has visibly and deeply healed. But what has happened during the healing process? Different things have popped up – one of the first things was, my organs felt they had been reorganized. My joints would take turns complaining. Next, I no longer could get on my horse from the ground but need a mounting block. That will change, but for now that’s my reality. My surgeon was remarkably sensitive to my report and is happy that I’m healing faster than he expected.

What I find is my expectations can get in the way of my healing. My impatience with not being one hundred percent isn’t helpful. If I remain attentive I’m much better able to address the changes my body is making. If we think about our own bodies and how we might feel if we were the horse, when the horse is going through something, we might be able to have more patience with their process.

I found it hardest to deal with not being able to get into the saddle, or walk far. I can get remarkably out of touch with my own body. Many horse people are this way. This was a time for me to become extremely attentive. Every time is this time, but when something isn’t quite right, I become acutely aware of the need.

But back to the mesa, letting all those thoughts fall behind. In the saddle, I feel as though I’m home. We have at last achieved a place where we can comfortably ride out, the footing is good, the sun is out, there is no need to bring back the recent past as it is gone, let it go on the light breeze and keep eyes up on that magical horizon.

I feel when I am riding this horse that we have known each other forever, before we ever met in person, before I ever slipped on his back. There is something amoebic about it, like a James Michener novel, a “knowing” from the beginning of time. It took no time at all to come together as person and horse, horse and rider. He was already trained but highly nervous in his response to life. A horse that made me feel good because it was apparent that it was all about the relationship and the relationship was easy from the beginning. We were what each other wanted and needed.  It wasn’t one of those “relationship-building” challenges we hear so much about.

And now as we take in the beautiful spring light and easy whisper of the grasses, it feels like we have passed through a winter of quiet as well as some turmoil together, to come out of it to this. The ride is the reward for the bleakness of winter, but also the creativity discovered in winter, finding new ways to work with pain and mobility, and revisiting old ones.

Reaching a stopping point, there is nothing like sitting on a horse who is letting out a big sigh, maybe a sneeze. It reverberates through his body, and my body rises and expands with that breath, and we can exhale together. Yes, at last, we are sitting here, viewing the landscape, in love with everything again.

 

A Message for the New Year

Jazzie and Red together.

In October we lost my mare Jazzie, who was just shy of her 19th birthday. It has been emotionally tough to live without her huge presence in our lives. She is irreplaceable, and yet I draw some comfort knowing she is watching over us and will continue to be a powerful influence.

I adopted a young grade Arabian mare, whom I named Red (or she named herself), four years old. She came from a wonderful rehab and rescue center in Santa Fe, which provided a loving respite from previous traumatic  experiences.

Red isn’t a replacement, she is her own horse. She is young and curious about everything, and especially her interactions with humans and her training. She loves her training. What I’m seeing in her is that everything is an adventure. While her first years were fraught with uncertainty, fear and mistreatment, when she didn’t want anyone to catch or touch her, she has now landed somewhere where everyone listens to her and she wants to listen.

The loss of Jazzie and the introduction of Red are changing my teaching. I relied so heavily on Jazzie’s intelligence in terms of teaching; her sixth sense as far as knowing what a student needed to know, or even what was needed in a teaching video. Now I seek to find out what innate intelligence is available in the new herd. I come into awareness of their changing relationships, and how they relied on each other for certain strengths and roles. They have reorganized since Jazzie’s passing. They make it work.

The new configuration.

This experience with Red is also showing me the interface between training and bodywork. I can see that when Red doesn’t respond to something I want her to do, it has been when she has felt unable to do it. She has either frozen in place or felt her body imbalance stick her somewhere that makes it impossible to turn or lower her head, or turn to the right.

It has been a learning process for me, asking questions, where is she stuck, where is the brace in her body? And then going in and softening, loosening, however that looks. Some days have been all about that, softening, finding the connection in the body so it could ease its defensive posture. How many defensive postures could a young mare hold?

Red has come to the place where she can position her body where she wants me to work. This is something I love to see in horses I work with, as it demonstrates a recognition of what I can offer and their connection to it, at the same time, recognizing that they can use the stimulus given and self-correct.

Primarily with everything we’re doing, it takes the time it takes. If the resistance isn’t removed then there is nowhere to go, there is no pushing through it to the other side. If there is no physical resistance there may sometimes be emotional resistance because an avoidance habit was formed in the past or she was taught something that wasn’t useful. I need to manage my energy so as not fall into Red’s stuff, ask in the right way, to remind her of what she is capable of.

This is not a horse that you would put the traditional “30 days” on and then think all was good to go. Probably that doesn’t work for 99% of the horses out there, but given economics and the way people perceive training and horses, it’s a norm, though not a very sustainable one.

I’m seeing more bridges between bodywork and training. We work with the nervous system in each of these practices, if we do it right. Where the horse is excitable (flight/fright), we calm it. Where it is too sluggish (rest/relaxation), we enliven it.  With good work on the nervous system, a horse can usually self-regulate and not immediately go into high alert and react over everything.

I have been fortunate enough to have a few “horses of a lifetime,” not just one. Each one has different gifts and teaches me something new. When they feel comfortable in their home, they feel heard and seen, then they will show their gifts. Many horses go through life without showing their true gifts to people, because there are many people who won’t see the gifts even if hit in the face with them. Horses don’t “throw pearls before swine,” as the saying goes. Some of mine have been horses of a lifetime in spite of me and my agendas at the time. I listen better now. I’m not so driven.

What is the purpose of this message, you might ask? Is it about the new horse, mourning the loss of a deceased horse, training or bodywork?

It’s about everything. It’s about the changes that we make to accommodate the new, while mourning the loss of the old. It’s about the evolution of body and training, and how training is absorbed and perceived by each individual being.

I’m reminded of how Jazzie would raised her leg and made sure a student was holding it correctly and compressing into the perfect place that would initiate change for her. I will remember how she positioned herself so that the student or I would get the hint of where to work next. And her incredible intuition with bodywork in the saddle comes to me each time I climb in the saddle, creating a valuable change for both horse and rider.

Jazzie was very good at what she did; she was patient and impatient simultaneously, and perhaps so because on some level, she knew she didn’t have a long time on this earth. Humans needed to get it right quickly. Such a well-adjusted, sensible mare was valuable for those who were less well-adjusted and sensible and pure joy for everyone else.

I work with performance horses, race horses, horses in training, geriatric horses, injured horses, traumatized horses, pregnant mares and newborn foals, horses who are getting ready to pass from this world and those passed.  I work with the people who love them. They are all on different paths, at their own tempos.

With the dawning of the new year, I feel a shift in the work I do. I may work with deepening the links between people and horses, or bodywork as a more integral support for training. Very often what isn’t working for a horse isn’t working for the people either.

My wish is that you will deepen your experience in 2023, either on your own, in practice, with or without horses, or in classes. Whatever moves you. This quiet, cold time of winter (and not for those in the southern hemisphere, of course!) is open to introspection and weaving together a new beginning, not a replacement for what was, but a lengthening of “being” into the coming months.

Meditation for a New Year

As I have received so many Happy New Year messages from so many, I feel compelled to write one too. There is an eagerness, a hopefulness that this year will be better than the last. New year’s resolutions are made and discarded at the first temptation to do otherwise. Perhaps because they put more expectations on us.

“Hope smiles from the threshold of the year to come,

Whispering ‘it will be happier’.” Alfred Lord Tennyson

So maybe we talk about something else – how it’s possible to reach out to people and animals across the planet, not just in our backyard? That while in some parts of the world you might be snowed in or otherwise unable to go minister to somebody who needs it, you can send a message. Not just ‘I’m thinking of you, hearts and prayers,’ but a message from my heart to yours.  They may live five thousand miles away. Or if the body is not responding well at all, how about just sitting with the person or animal, being with them? If you can’t sit still for whatever reason, do something.

One morning recently I could not take care of someone’s animal physically, and so I decided to make bread. I decided then to make the bread in honor of that animal, and lo and behold the animal got up and started moving. In a way, taking the pressure off, just doing stuff, may have made a difference.

The message sent does not carry any baggage; it’s not a pushing or moving of energy, it’s  just an inquiry, or a sitting with a situation, not influencing a particular outcome.

With one animal I worked with at distance over the holidays, at first she couldn’t bear my making contact. I said in that case, I’ll just be over here, and sit with you but not too close. After that, she began to inch closer and began to share herself. It was completely her decision.

How do we work without expectation to embody a sense of well-being in ourselves and others?

A way to begin this may be as follows:

Hold a meditation for the new year. I strongly suggest getting comfortable, with a cup of your favorite tea or coffee.

Begin with the body, your body and include your animal bodies. Begin with the space between the big and next toe and just hold it and see what you feel. Do you feel a connection to another part of you? Does it hold a memory? If so, just remember that but move on to another part – the lower leg, the knee, the hips, the buttocks. Some of these areas may hold a memory of pain, a surgery, a fall. If you feel you’re getting plugged up there for some reason, or the body doesn’t want you there, leave it and move on up the body. If you’re working with an animal at the same time, the animal may have areas it feels at the same time as you, or different ones that pull at you, areas it wants to avoid or becomes sad with upon contact.

So acknowledge those sensitive areas and move on. Move on to the midsection, remember you pass through various chakras at the same time, where different energies are held. You don’t have to identify those now, you can simply know that you have a root chakra, sacral, solar plexus, heart, throat, third eye and crown. At any one of those places along the midline and the band surrounding it laterally on both sides (heart will include shoulders, for example), you may hold energies of either good or bad things. Just the recognition may bring a certain peace. If it doesn’t, move on to a new location.

You can hold your hands upturned at your sides and feel warmth grow in your hands. These are the hands that can touch or simply hold energy for others, and for yourself.

Moving up through the heart area – what do you feel? During this colder season, sometimes the chest area becomes compressed, warding off cold, and the heart becomes squashed in there. It needs room to feel everything it can feel.

Then move further up to the throat, the third eye above your eyebrows, and crown at the center of the top of your head.

Check now and see what parts of you feel lit up, alive. Which are they? Connect one of them to an area that doesn’t feel so alive or is in pain or emotional turmoil, and see what happens.

Sometimes just gently cupping the face area can relax the tension collected by frowns, tense jaws, concentration, worries. Once recognized, you may move to a place of seeing differently, quietly, letting peace drape around you like a soft blanket.

To come out of the meditation when ready, retrace your journey from head to feet, slowly, checking in with each area. See how it feels. Is there still tension or disturbance there or has it gone? Is a painful place less troubled? Does another area call you? Check with your animals as you retrace the journey with them.

In this small meditation, your body and/or your animal’s body gets to have a voice. It is given space to move and decide, or not.

This is what I want for my new year – to enter a realm of possibility for healing without a list of expectations.

 

Finding Gratitude

Nearly everyone I speak to is looking forward to 2020 being over with. Whatever our belief systems are, this has been a tough year for everyone. Many know people ill with Covid or who have passed on. Many have lost jobs and income as a result of it. The continual shuttering and re-opening of an economy is taking its toll.

With each new onslaught, it becomes more difficult to rally. Overall, while most of us take great care with our families, friends and co-workers, we stand by and watch carelessness run rampant on a global scale on a daily basis. To me, it means we become more careful, and more conscientious, and provide excellence wherever we can, continuing on what we started. Health care workers and those providing food are tirelessly putting their lives on the line for the rest of us, so we can stay home and remain safe. It makes sense to support them in every way we can.

This year, as a result of all this, Thanksgiving has shifted its tone. It is the tone of watchfulness and fear, coupled with the deep disappointment of not being able to hold our traditional family gatherings the way we always have done. How can we still enjoy ourselves?

Several grocery stores have shut down just before Thanksgiving here, so that puts additional strain on the ones that can remain open. While I might have cooked certain things for Thanksgiving dinner, now I will improvise. And other than the Zoom and FaceTime calls, Thanksgiving will pass like any other day for us, as we just stay home, hunkered down with whatever food we have purchased for those who live in the household only. Maybe watch “Planes, Trains and Automobiles.” No running out to buy last minute whipped cream or nuts.

I think about what we are going through this year as an opportunity to express gratitude. America is not my native country, but I have lived here most of my life.  I love it here, I love wide open spaces and the ability, particularly here in New Mexico, to have places to go where there aren’t people if you need to get away from it all. Now getting away from it all takes on a new meaning.

The current situation, while separating us, can also serve to bring us together, recognizing the plight of others, recognizing how much community means to us.

If I see someone I know while riding my horse, it’s exciting. We are muffled behind masks and yet there is that sense of community that prevails, of sharing, getting to see each other even from afar.

I have put together a list – sort of like the song “My Favorite Things” – a “raindrops on roses” list of things I’m grateful for. If I do this every day, gratitude becomes more attainable, not so deeply buried under other concerns.

  1. The sharing of thoughts and feelings over the phone, movies and recipes! The phone has become more important!
  2. New or renewed interests: art, vegetable gardening
  3. The availability of new knowledge and great students (via Zoom!)
  4. Family and friends
  5. Working outdoors – even when it’s cold!
  6. Meditation
  7. Animals of all kinds
  8. Natural beauty
  9. Sense of calm
  10. Riding

Can we still have adventures? Yes, we can. When we can return to normal activities, will we remember?

Stanley George and Violet Hunt, my grandparents

My family grew up in wartime London. My mother never forgot rationing, being without food, needing warm clothes and shoes. Experience like that shapes you, makes you careful about what you spend your money on, makes you take care of things and people more than perhaps you did before. When I would puzzle over why she would save things, use up scraps, she would tell me what it was like for her as a teenager. She didn’t have the freedom to be wasteful or careless.

This is nothing in comparison, and there were those far less fortunate then as now. Our current situation is a lesson in caring, gratitude for what we have, and conservation. For those who are impatient or tired of it all, it won’t last forever. Nothing ever does. Can we have adventures? Of course we can. Each morning, we awaken to a new adventure. And gratitude for what we have helps us grow our resilience, which we sorely need right now.

I would love to hear others’ gratitude lists. In the meantime, have a Happy Thanksgiving, whatever that turns out to be.

Science Proves Gratitude is Key to Well Being

While I haven’t limited my grateful list to topics of six words, this New York Times article asks readers to:

Tell Us What You’re Grateful For, in Six Words

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reach Out and Don’t Touch Someone

We are all in this together, and yet we are to remain apart. There is stress about social distancing, our new norm, worldwide. Why is that? We can reach out and call people, thankfully we also have social media, but I still hear from friends, colleagues and clients that they feel isolated.

As a bodyworker for people and horses and the occasional dog, I feel it intensely. Ortho-Bionomy is a form of bodywork that is not just a spa treatment that you receive when you get a gift certificate and you feel better for a couple of days and forget about it. Ortho-Bionomy is transformative, it deepens your own body’s understanding of itself, it reaches inward and brings health and balance to all your systems. Each level of the body – bone, muscle, sinew – each system – circulatory, lymph, visceral – is affected by an Ortho-Bionomy session. It invites the body to come meet itself and have a conversation. And that conversation can continue on long after the session is over, well into the next week or months, depending upon your body’s ability to correct itself and stay corrected.

The possibility of a “conversation with a body” was the hook for me when I was first finding out about bodywork modalities. What is that like? Is that possible? I wondered. Years later, I realize my body seeks that. If I cannot afford the time or money to get a session, then I feel the need. I gravitate towards self-care, and other exercises of course. They are immensely helpful.

I will talk about the importance of touch. What I learned recently is that the skin and brain are developed from the exact same primitive cells. So you could say the skin is the outer surface of the brain, or view the brain as the deepest layer of the skin. When you think of it this way, it is no wonder that we are troubled by the lack of human physical contact. There is much more about this but this is food for thought. With animals we have the fur factor – fur closely attached to skin.

According to the anatomy book, Job’s Body, by Deane Juhan, studies done by Johns Hopkins Hospital in 1915 in orphanages revealed the infant mortality rate within one year of admission was 99%. This led to further studies of all orphanages, finding that they were severely understaffed and consequently the infants lacked human cuddling. There was only enough time, to clean, feed and take care of their basic needs. Once more staff were added in a major overhaul of the system, the children received much needed cuddling, and they thrived in all ways. Great increases in energy, height, weight and mental well-being were seen – and the death rate decreased exponentially.

So when we must deprive ourselves, even as adults, of this very primal need for touch communication, where do we go next? When we’re advised to curtail all “non-essential” activities, I and my clients don’t consider Ortho-Bionomy non-essential. But since it is not an essential such as going to the grocery store (far more dangerous!), we comply with the rules that are intended to save our lives.

As a bodyworker, working on any body is never a one-way conversation. I’m not just doing techniques to or on someone. I’m asking questions, the body or being is speaking back to me in numerous ways. It’s not always something I can verbalize.

Today we are dealing with a deadly virus that is shaping the social structure of our lives. We must not touch, except those in your own household, period. Stay a safe distance away.

Fortunately, Ortho-Bionomy has a number of “phases,” unlike some modalities where the only option is touch. I can take the conversation off the body and have that conversation a little farther away, over the phone maybe, or in space, because the conversation has an energetic quality. I know some people are scared off by the mention of “energy,” but we are all energy, everything possesses energy. So it really isn’t frightening. It might seem frightening to imagine someone tinkering around with your energy.

But that’s not what I’m talking about. It’s the energy of the conversation that can remain alive without the physical touch, without any force or intrusion into the person or animal’s consciousness. I can work with the body without the body being anywhere nearby. It’s a part of Ortho-Bionomy and it is only done with consent of the individual.

There is a collective consciousness right now that has everyone on edge, trying to find balance but getting knocked off balance daily, in some cases hourly, by some new grisly news report. Is that collective consciousness something you can see or is it something you feel? Think about it. It’s all energetic, rippling through the global community.

Horses have a herd mentality. Part of that is communicating without touching – flattening their ears or moving toward another horse  across the pasture to get them to move, just twitching an ear in some cases. I only wish I had ears that talented. They also communicate with other species like birds. They can keep each other healthy and safe by moving the least among them. Their finely tuned energetic sense of what they need to have happen means everything.

Before the pandemic took such a tight hold of us, (just a couple of weeks ago, perhaps?) I did an Energetic Healing Communication session with a dog who was limping. She had been expecting the session. The owner asked that I take her own injured finger into consideration too if I had time. I worked with the areas the owner had said she felt the dog needed work. I felt the session was very concrete, meaning very mechanical for her, but that was what she was asking for. She even became impatient with me at times.

Then she said: “guarding causes you to lock out, then fear, then lose the ability to take in good things.”

This was very huge, not only for the dog but for the owner, and for me. We are all guarded right now. We have to be but we will be wise to remember what that does to our nervous system. It makes us less able to notice or receive good things.

And then, the dog wove her owner’s physical injury into her own healing. I worked with the area between the nails of the paws. The owner reported her finger feeling 75% better. The dog ended her session on her own, satisfied, and went to lie down and rest.

That will probably never happen again in exactly that way or even close to it. That is the beauty of Ortho-Bionomy bodywork. It is special, it is for you personally, or for you and your dog or horse or cat and it is tailored to your needs. It is not a panacea, a pill or a blanket solution.

So, while this may sound farfetched to some and right at home to others, I will leave you with this: we need communication. We need the conversation, and if it isn’t physical, then energetic. We communicate in some different ways than horses or dogs. We have the higher intellect, or so I’m told.

Yet, we aren’t as good at taking care of ourselves energetically as animals are. We have to be conscious of making sure to keep ourselves open to good things, like the wise dog said, while we are in these oppressive times.

So reach out and don’t touch someone, but do  – energetically – across time and hold space for them and their healing. In that small way, I hope we can make a significant difference.

P.S. You may touch your horse, dog or cat!

 

Winter Walking with Sabio

We walk down the road, vehicle tracks as rigid deep veins in the frozen mud, sheets of ice glistening in the pale winter sun. It’s treacherous footing but we have to get out.

Our usual stop is to visit two young mares in a pasture, who are always excited to see another horse coming down the road. Today, Sabio stops and looks at them, but he doesn’t ask to go over and visit. Often he has gone over and sniffed noses and taken in their muzzles exploring his face and neck as though it was a special treat. But today, he looked and he decided he wanted to continue walking with me and didn’t give them a backward glance.

This demonstrated to me that he had gotten accustomed to their presence and that he was perfectly happy walking with me. At that point he made that decision not to visit with them, I felt a deep connection come from him, him matching my stride, us walking together. I often feel this with him while in the saddle too, but when I am on the ground next to him, I’m then like another horse. Horses walk side by side, they walk one behind the other. There is a rhythm to this, different from the rhythm of us being on their backs. I want all those rhythms. I want to feel all of it.

The other part of the walk is observing together. If he takes an interest in the mares, so do I. If he takes interest in some far off call of a coyote, I turn my head in the same direction. I often can’t hear and see what he has going on in his world, but it doesn’t matter. I want to know. I want to be more horse than I am. I want the senses he was born with, the broader knowledge of his world. He is my entry into that world, whether I will ever hear or see what he can or not.

Winter can be bleak here in the Southwest, with snow blowing across frozen stalks of wild grasses, tree trunks gone rigid and cracking from the cold. Once when it was warmer, a dust devil lifted dried horse poop into a swirl and hit me full in the face. It is not a romantic setting, yet there is something wild and beautiful about it all. It is a time for hibernation and yet I’m out here in the muck and cold walking a horse before the sun disappears.

We share this with the crows cawing, lighting on clawlike branches and taking flight when we come near. We share it with the coyotes who are the same color as the land and sunlight, fleets of yellow-brown fur hunkering low to the ground at a trot in hopes of not being noticed, stealthy, cunning.

On the way back, I tossed the leadrope over his back to see what he would do. He grazed on what was available, finds something tasty hidden under the snow; sticks with me. At times I led the way, other times he moved ahead, just as though we were two horses exploring. The only difference is I’m a human. He has the ability to move away and come back but I don’t really feel him leave. He looks at me, wants to know which direction at times, or even suggest a direction. Occasionally, I point or lead the way.

I feel his connection without the leadrope, with only his attention moving between his curiosity and staying close, a leadrope tethered to my heart, not my hand.

 

 

Where does our love of horses come from?

Continue reading Where does our love of horses come from?